Please don’t make standing my ground any harder than it already is. 

How terrible I feel right now. I have had this guilt eating at my soul for the past couple days. I hate lying. I have to cover this up though. I know I need to tell you and I just can’t grow the balls to. I don’t want our friendship to end because of this. I just want you to know how sorry I am. How I wish you would forgive me if you ever found out. I betrayed you, and I know that. I know sorry isn’t enough to say and do to get you to forgive me but this guilt feels like punishment enough even though I know it’s not all I deserve. And what I did wasn’t what you deserved either. But this will NEVER happen again and it shouldn’t have even happened in the first place.